True Friends

The more I learn of myself the more I dislike myself. I believe this is the case with everyone in my life as well. The more someone gets to know me the fewer friends I have. I have few friends who I can say other wise, and why they are still around is such a mystery to me. I really struggle when people whom I want to be accepted by reject me and hurt me. It lingers for a really long time. I don’t make a lot of friends, but the friends that I make are most definitely quality. That is why when one of them breaks my trust and my heart, it hurts so badly. And when another one tells me that being around me is not his favorite thing. It burns. I make friends for keeps not just to have a big number. I am not a friend whore; I won’t call you a friend unless I actually consider you a friend. Now to help me realize what I actually have, and to show you all what true friends are, My bestest best friend Harrison…

Harrison: We met under… let’s just say… we met under unusual circumstances. We met just about a year ago. In the past year we have been through a lot together. A lot of annoyances, hate-filled conversations, a lot of mistrust, misuse, a lot of care and concern, a lot of rough days, but also a lot of great times, and most importantly a lot of love. No matter how crappy I treat him he is there. He is there for me no matter the time of day, or how angry I am. Has been one of my best friends that I have ever had. Even a couple of weeks ago when I wasn’t in my right mind I told him that if he loved me and was a true friend he would just let me die, I wanted to die so badly, He wouldn’t listen to me, that little shit!!! Even now if I were to go to him and tell him what I am feeling, even though he is with his friends right now, he would talk to me. He would help me understand what is going on. He would help me in his own frustrating way to get through it. Many people don’t believe me when I say that Harrison is freaking awesome, but he really is. If you don’t believe me just find out for yourself. You have to actually get to know him, But he is loyal, and kind, and loving, and genuine, and…!! I know that Harrison would be there for me even if I did do something stupid. He would even make up some stupid story that no one would believe just to help me not look so pathetic. I love this man and will always be true to him because he has always been true to me even in our rough times. And those who can call him friend consider yourselves lucky!!! =)

And the most recent person whom I consider to be lucky to be friends with me is, Jalopy. He is this really cool guy who sneak attacked me into a date with him. He is so sneaky. We have been friends for almost a year, but due to some ‘situations’ we never really got close, we would chat once in a long while and then not chat again for a long while. But then the AMAZING musical RENT came to town and we went together with a few other people. He sure knew what he was doing. I have not been ready to date due to the recent breaking of my heart and destroying of my trust in other people. But he did just the right things and said the right things and was just the right guy. Jalopy is someone who I have always considered a great guy. But in the past few weeks as we have talked and chatted I have come to find out that he is incredible. He has his head securely fastened and he loves himself unlike a lot of people I know, He has goals and desires for his life. He talks to me like I am someone to care about and not just a project or a client. He is by far too good for me and I don’t know what it is that he see’s in me! I hope that when He gets to know me better he doesn’t run away. He makes me feel great about myself. Back a few weeks ago I posted on the Great Book of Face that I wanted someone that had a weird that matches mine. Well jalopy is weird and his weird and my weird match really well. He doesn’t judge me when I start dancing in public or when I sing in weird obnoxious voices. Or when I do Braden characteristic things. He likes me and I like him. Haha!! And if any of you that may possibly be reading this don’t know, I am gay!! Haha

Well anyway this has gone on far too long already, I have many more amazing people in my life, and someday I will introduce them all to you. Here to list a few; Brittany P., Erica J., Nicholass, Spencer, Nicole S., and through Harrison- Tylor T., and many more!!!! I love you all and hope that I don’t and won’t disappoint you too much throughout the time that we know each other

And thanks to Jordan for helping me get this posted correctly! haha
Braden

The who I am #1

I am Braden Williams Dunbar, I come from a line of amazing people. I am privileged to carry both my mother's maiden name and my father's surname. I am proud of those of my family that have come before me. My first name and the coming about of me being called Braden are just another part of who I am.
My mother wanted to be able to call me Brady while i was a kid. She didn't want that to be my real name, just a nickname. So she decided on Braydon. She has thought that she had made this name up. Come to find out there were a few Braydons around already. But still creative if i do say so myself.
Luckily mom didn't like the way she had spelled it so she had it changed. I much prefer Braden over the many other spellings out there, ie: Braydon, Brayden, Braydun, Braiden, Braidon, Braidun, Braiden, Bradun, Bradon. I think my spelling, of course, is the best and most esthetically pleasing way of spelling it. I get called Brandon by most people and it used to bother me. But I have come to the conclusion, who cares, They don't know me and when they do get to know me they won't make that mistake very often. hehe.
I love my full name and the power that is behind each section of it.  If you think about it, I am as unique and amazing as my name itself. I mean never in my life have I had another Braden in a class at school or anything like that. The closest thing to having someone with that same name as me was as a missionary, Another Elder in the mission was a Braden as well. So the name is unique. And for those of you that haven't had the opportunity to play the middle name guessing game with me. You are lucky. No one every really wins, My middle name is not William, it is WIlliams, totally different. And i wouldn't tell people they got it right if they guessed WIlliam. I am proud of the chance i have to be named after my mother's side of the family. Yes growing up and hating to write I despised having such a long middle name, but i have found the fun of writing it. It is a really fun name/word to write in cursive.
One of my favorite things about my name as many of you have been told probably multiple times, is that if you take my first name and my last name all the letters match except for the E and the U so cool. You don't have to agree about the coolness but i think it is fantastic. How many of you can say that about your names?
Well I have now gone on way to long about my name. I would encourage you to look at your name and see what you can write about it. This has been fun, and I have been able to gain a stronger appreciation for my name as I have done this. Wow that was fun!! haha
Random I know but what are blogs for? =)

First post!

 So I figure i will start this blog with a statement of myself.

Trust

My trust is strong as a marble edifice, yet fragile as a delicate flower.

My trust is given freely, Given as if you and i have been friends for eternity.

My trust is broken just as easily, when you take it as a useless gift. 

My heart is torn, 

When it is given as one would receive their grandmothers cherished china or their grandfather's coveted rifle.

One must protect and not sell such a gift for anything.