Tuesday, October 11, 2011

Coming out!! I finally did it!!!!

Today is a day to celebrate who we are!!!!
So As I sit here today contemplating this move, I have gone back and forth and back and forth. Tis not an easy thing for me to admit that I am different. I like being part of the 'normal' population. But at the same time I love being who I am. I Love Braden Williams Dunbar. I am a great person and have lived a fairly blessed life. I have an amazing family who love me. I have great friends who are willing to stand by me even when I am being anything but a true friend. 
The move that I am making today is to tell the world of Facebook that I, Braden Williams Dunbar, am a Gay man. And I am not ashamed of it. I am proud of who I am and what I have done with my life.
Happy National Coming Out day. 

Now my initial coming out to myself and my family took a little more effort and courage than a Facebook status.

I came out to one of my aunts, my Aunt Randy more than a year ago probably a year and half two years ago. I chose her because she lived in Hawaii and I knew she would just listen to me. I haven't spoken to her about it since. Which I may change soon.
Next I told Juliann, the best sister I could have asked for, a few months later. I took her out to lunch and as we pulled into the parking lot to her work i told her there was more. I said "I mean I will take my favorite sister to lunch anytime but there is something I have to tell you". so then I told her and she said she loved me and would support me with my choice to act on these feelings. She is truly and amazing support to me.
After telling her and many friends I felt I had the support I needed to be able to go tell my parents. I told them March 20th. I had just gotten back from a trip to visit Grandpa Dunbar, Aunt Anne and Cousin Katie. I was really nervous, but I knew I needed to just do it. I had gone to Stake Conference with them earlier that day. They had just woken up from their Sunday nap and I went in and just kind of told them. And left them with a book to read. We hugged and I walked out got in my car and drove back to SLC. I didn't cry until later that night as I thought about what had just happen. And the potential for some life altering shock waves. Luckily I am blessed with amazing parents and siblings who had already put ripples in the Dunbar pool of perfection. I am grateful for the family that I was blessed with. None of us are perfect and none of us expect the others to be. 
Next it was time to tell the brothers. Most of you don't know my brothers. You can Facebook stalk them if you would like. they are Doug, Randall, and Jarom. They are all pretty cool guys. I didn't want to have to come out three more times. So I was working on telling them. Actually Jarom was the first of the boys to know. He asked me the day of mother's graduation if I was gay. And I answered him honestly. I believe this was right after I had told the parents. But I told Randall and Doug through and email that I sent to them and others of my family. In the email I explained that I love them and appreciated the years we spent together growing up.
They didn't respond for a bit. When they did respond they responded with the I love you but don't support the lifestyle. I love them and can just hope that throughout time they will be willing to be open minded and love me for who exactly I am.
I have had many friends who have given me endless support through my coming out to family. Through listening to me talk about the boys I am dating and on and on. If I could list them all I would. But the few that I know really need to be mentioned are Harrison Spendlove, he has been one of the biggest supports of mine. Even though he wouldn't take me out of this life when I begged him to.
And I would Also like to thank, even though they won't be reading this, those guys that I have dated. I am glad that I was able to meet each of you and will treasure the lessons learned. Thank you Ty, and Steven and Jeff. You each brought a new part to my life that I didn't know I needed. 
I look forward to the day that I will find the man that I can spend my life with. I know it is possible and I know that I want that.

thank you all for reading this. I know it is a little long but it is all what I needed to say. I am sure I will think of something I wish I would have said.

Feel free to comment and post I would love the feed back. 
I love you and hope that You can still see that I am still the lovable and loving Braden Williams Dunbar.